Having Children shouldn't be this hard. Am I just delusional in thinking this? A little girl is supposed to grow up, fall in love, marry a wonderful man, and then have children. There shouldn't be any major decisions to make. It should just happen. But you know...... it doesn't always happen that way.
I have lost my way a little. Yesterday, I read this article. I must say it has upset me quite a lot. If it's true, I have been misguided in thinking that I would be saving an orphan girl from a country that doesn't want her. But if it is true about the parents waiting four or more years to adopt domestically from China..... I don't want to take their children from them. Special Needs adoption from China would still be an option, but can I take it? Can I handle picking out a child and not getting her? Can Marc handle this? Or should we choose another country? It would be so much easier to go to say...Russia than to deal with all of the China unknown.
I have just been searching for a sign. From God. Searching for him to tell me what to do, what to believe, and what to hope for.
This would all be much simpler if I could figure out exactly what the pull to China adoption is. Is it because I lost my little girl in such a way....... do I need redemption? I want so terribly to save a little girl from suffering. And in return, to save myself from suffering?
1 comment:
Hi Jodie, I read the article and I must say it IS disturbing. I don't know how much of it I believe - I do know that there is another side to the story and I tend to take things in balance. I read the other day that 80% of children in Chinese orphanages are special needs children. If that is true, it makes sense that there would be a "shortage" of NSN children for both domestic and international adoption (I hate the word shortage but you know what I mean).
Have you thought about Ethiopia? I don't know if you all have a preference for Asia over Africa... but one of my best friends just brought home a baby boy from Ethiopia and is going back for her little girl in a couple of weeks. The situation there is TRULY heartbreaking and there is a desperate need. The children are really beautiful. On my blog there is a link to the Hausam's blog (As For Me And My Haus), click on that and you can see pictures of their little girl Elianna from Ethiopia. The process to adopt is very quick, only 3-6 months for referral and I can recommend a good agency.
Who knows, perhaps this unsettled feeling with China is meant to steer you towards another country. Keep your heart open and let God lead you!! I know He'll make it clear. :)
Blessings,
Rebecca
P.S. Not all China agencies have committees where they put you in a pool with other families to "compete" for a SN child. Our agency does not do that. You have a child's file exclusively for 1 week. If you decide yes, that child is yours - no committee.
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